With Emma about Norway, fulfilling her dreams, and long-distance relationships
- Kamila Bonhard
- Sep 30, 2023
- 10 min read
I had the honour of conducting the Norway interview in person, after a long series of online interviews. (The previous and until now the only interview conducted in this way was the first one with Chilean Paz living in Prague.)
Emma Lunde was born and lived her entire life in Norway, hailing from the capital city of Oslo. For the past year, she has been living with her boyfriend in Chile, and that's just one of the many things we have in common. We met at a café in the centre of Santiago, the capital of Chile, where over some delicious ice cream, she shared with me her insights about Norway and her life journey that brought her here.
"I feel like we were the last generation that simply went outside, rang our friends' doorbells, and asked, 'Hey, does Kim want to come out and play?' That doesn't happen these days. Instead, kids have to call or send a message in advance. If you suddenly show up at someone's door, it's almost considered strange, like, 'Hey, what are you doing here?' We were spontaneous; we hopped on our bikes and went to the store to buy chocolate milk; we just lived in the moment. I really cherish such memories."
What do you like the most and the least about Norway?
There are many things I love about Norway. I adore our culture and the fact that we have functional systems, like a good healthcare system. I appreciate that people are active in sports. They engage in various sports activities, whether with friends or alone.
I love nature. In Norway, it's easy to go hiking. Whether you live in Oslo or a smaller town, there's always a mountain, forest, lake, or ocean nearby. People genuinely appreciate this and dedicate time to these activities after work. When the weather is nice, everyone heads outdoors, maybe for a swim or a picnic in the park. I'm grateful that I could grow up in a peaceful environment where I could go downtown or into nature with friends whenever I wanted.
But every country has its pros and cons. One of the things I love about living in Chile is that I have the opportunity to compare different places and take the best from both worlds. When we live in another country, we can learn a lot from each other. One thing I've realized here is that people in Norway are not as open as they are here in Chile. We are more reserved. Many people say that people in our region are rude and cold, but that's only on the surface. In reality, we behave this way because we value mutual respect and don't want to bother anyone. This may come across as being cold and closed in communication with others.
In the USA, for example, it's common for someone to start a conversation with you at a bus stop. That wouldn't happen in Norway. People keep their distance. But it's not because people are rude; on the contrary, it's a sign of respect. It may also be harder to form friendships, but that doesn't mean we aren't good friends.
So, I try to take the best from both cultures. I've noticed, for instance, that when people in Chile are getting off a bus, almost everyone says 'Thank you!' to the driver. That's great. So, I started doing that too, and when I was last in Norway, I continued the practice there as well.
Did people in Norway look at you strangely for doing that?
Yes, they stared at me like I was crazy. But I asked myself, how often in Norway does someone thank the bus driver? Maybe once or twice a day. Whereas in Chile, it's hundreds of people. That's a huge difference. So why shouldn't we do things that have a positive impact, even if it might be a bit uncomfortable at first?
Can you think of any other stereotypes about Norway that people mistakenly believe in?
Perhaps the belief that it's cold and freezing in Norway all year round. But, in reality, we do have four seasons. Maybe our summer is a bit shorter than in other places, but we do experience warm summer days. Sometimes I like to joke with people and tell them that in Oslo, polar bears walk the streets, and they actually believe it.
Last month, I had a guest on my blog from Scotland, and he has a question for you: If you could take only one thing from your country abroad, what would it be?
That's a good question. There are several things I miss, but I think the answer is pretty clear because I really love Norwegian chocolate. So yes, I would bring back chocolate.
How is it different from other types of chocolate?
I think it's just because it's the chocolate I grew up with, so it's probably not necessarily the best, but it's the one I'm used to, and I can't find it anywhere else. Here in Chile, they also have good chocolate, but it's not the same.
What else do you miss here?
I really miss homemade bread. Fresh, crispy, and somewhat healthier, dark bread. Here, they typically only sell white bread.
And we have this cheese that's brown. I don't know if you've ever heard of it. It's a cheese that's simply brown and very sweet because it contains sugar. It's really good, you can put it on bread or waffles. I miss that a lot too.
Well, I've only talked about the food I miss. If I were to mention something else that's not food, it would probably be having nature even in the capital city. Of course, you can still go on nature trips from Santiago, but for real nature, you have to travel a bit further. Norway makes it easy to visit lakes, the ocean, or even go on a short hike in the middle of the city. Santiago itself has more residents than all of Norway, so it makes sense that it's harder to get from the city to nature here.
Note: Norway has 5.4 million residents compared to 6.8 million residents in Santiago.
What is the most challenging aspect of life in Chile?
I think the most challenging aspect is the fact that it's so far away from the rest of my family. Having family in multiple parts of the world is probably the most difficult thing for me.
I have family here in Chile, in Norway, but also in Switzerland, where I lived for four months and had an amazing host family. So, I consider them as my family too. These are three places where I'd like to be all at once, and that's probably the hardest part.
But besides that, it's also the adjustment to a different culture and language in general. I try to fit in, but I look like a total alien; everyone knows I'm not from here. (Note: You don't see many people with blond hair and blue eyes walking the streets of Santiago.)
However, it's great here. I have fantastic support from my boyfriend and his family, and I feel very welcome.
What are some of your favourite memories?
One of my favourite childhood memories is a little prank we used to play on people with my siblings. One day, when we went out, we brought two walkie-talkies with us. We hid one in the grass next to the sidewalk and covered it a bit. Then, we hid behind the trees, and when people walked by, we spoke to them through the walkie-talkie, and they were always bewildered, wondering what it was. It was a fantastic spontaneous joke.
I feel like we were the last generation that simply went outside, rang our friends' doorbells, and asked, 'Hey, does Kim want to come out and play?' That doesn't happen these days. Instead, kids have to call or send a message in advance. If you suddenly show up at someone's door, it's almost considered strange, like, 'Hey, what are you doing here?'
We were spontaneous; we hopped on our bikes and went to the store to buy chocolate milk; we just lived in the moment. I really cherish such memories.
What experience or life moment do you think has shaped you the most into the person you are now?
I believe my entire childhood and later years in Oslo had a significant impact on shaping me. I went to school there, studied, and worked in bioengineering for several years, and I loved that job. It was tough to leave it behind. But I always had a dream of going abroad to play floorball. So, I decided to leave my job and move to Switzerland for four months. That was two years ago. I truly believe it's one of the most amazing things I've ever done. I stepped out of my comfort zone and did something I'd always wanted to but never dared to do. Floorball was my passion; I played it for 20 years until I moved to Chile.
I lived in Switzerland for four months with an amazing host family, and it really opened my heart to travelling and experiencing other cultures and languages. I think anyone who decides to go abroad, where they have to rely on themselves and practically start from scratch, has many opportunities for personal growth.
If I had to mention a moment that happened earlier, it would be 10 years ago when I met Nico, my boyfriend. I went on a language exchange to Florida with my friends, and it was the first moment when I realized I could go anywhere and do something entirely different. If I hadn't taken that trip to Florida back then, I probably wouldn't have had the courage to go to Switzerland. So, Florida was probably the real turning point that changed me.
So, now you're living in Chile with your Chilean boyfriend whom you met 10 years ago in Florida, but you only moved to Chile a year ago. How did your relationship evolve during that time?
Well, we met entirely by chance 10 years ago at a water park in Florida. He asked me for my number, but since we were both in swimming suits and didn't have our belongings with us (our phones were stored in lockers), he had to write my number the old-fashioned way on a piece of paper he got at a nearby snack stand.
We chatted a bit but didn't meet again over the next two years. We maintained online contact but were just friends. After two years, I was planning another trip to Florida with a friend. At that time, Nico was in Chile, so he saved up money to come there and see me again. We met, and it was amazing. So amazing that we started a long-distance relationship.
He then lived in the USA for four years, attending a golf academy, so I flew to see him several times a year, and he came to visit me in Norway. In 2020, I planned to move to be with him, but the pandemic changed all plans. I stayed in Norway, Nico was in Chile, and it was a really challenging period. After some time, I gave up on the relationship, and we didn't see each other for about a year.
When the pandemic started to calm down though, I knew that I might move to Chile to be with him, but if I did that, I would never fulfil my floorball dream, and that's something I wanted to do for myself. So, I quit my job at that time and went to Switzerland. And now, I'm here.
What was the most challenging part of a long-distance relationship? What advice would you give to couples going through something similar?
Throughout each year, we saw each other about three to four times, and looking back on it now, I'm amazed at how we managed to sustain it for so long. But at that time, it was just our reality. Nico was my first serious relationship, so it was practically the only thing I knew. Both of us put a lot of effort into making it work, and every time we saw each other, it felt like the first time. It was exciting and very nice.
The most difficult part of long-distance was not being able to share those small moments in everyday life together, like picking each other up from work, hugging each other when we saw each other, having a picnic in the park or other date nights. Also not knowing when you will see the other person, so a great tip for anyone in the same situation is to try to plan when you’ll see each other again, maybe already buy tickets so that when you are saying goodbye you already know a date for when you’ll see each other again.
Also, another tip is to FaceTime often and send voice notes, that way you get to see each other and hear the voice instead of just texting. Also, try to be open and communicate as well as you can. We have had to work a lot on that and it has made us able to know what the other is thinking and feeling.
I recommend doing other small things for each other that might mean a lot, tell each other about your day and ask about their day, send a postcard from your place, send some chocolates or flowers, make a little video greeting and thanks to that you keep close even though you’re far from each other.
What advantages and issues come with an international relationship?
Jaké výhody a problémy přináší mezinárodní vztah?
One of the great things is you learn so much about another culture, country and language. You open your eyes to the world and you get to bring the best of both cultures and find what works for the two of you. Finding someone in another country that you click so well with despite different cultures is a magical thing.
And getting to travel. I love to travel and visit new places, and now we have two countries to explore. Generally, you grow and learn and get to see other beautiful things that you didn’t grow up with or grew up with in a different way.
Among the biggest disadvantages is having family in two places on opposite sides of the world. We both love our families and often wish we could gather everyone together more often or easily go from one to the other.
From that also comes the question of where should we settle down later in life. But it is also very exciting and it makes you think outside of the box to maybe have a goal of owning a place in both countries or building businesses in both places so we can keep seeing both families.
Another issue is different values and a different way of doing things. I’m for example very used to arriving on time, while here in Chile they are way more chill with time and don’t mind coming late. That has been a challenge to adjust to, but at the same time, I love seeing how they enjoy life here and don’t stress.
Is there anything you'd like to say to the readers?
I would love for people to feel welcome to visit Norway at any time. It would be amazing if everyone could visit our country at least once in their lifetime and experience it. We have so many fantastic places and things to discover. Whether you love the city, nature, or anything else, everyone can find something for themselves there.
Personally, I love Lofoten, which are islands in the north of Norway. They are a bit like the Norwegian version of Hawaii. There's crystal-clear blue water and mountains you can climb. It's a beautiful place.
Thank you Emma for such an interesting interview!
Did you learn anything new about Norway? Let me know your thoughts in the comments!
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